Are Your Friends Messing With Your Self Esteem? How Conflict Bred Cooperation (And Why It Might Cause Low Self Worth)

Sunday, February 02, 2014 by Meg   •   Filed under Evolutionary Psychology

In ancestral times, physical prowess was more important than it is today because it indicated greater survival capabilities. Therefore, physically-based social competition was commonplace. 

Interestingly, this competition seems to have laid the groundwork for nurturing and cooperation, according to evolutionary psychologists David Geary and Mark Flinn 1. But these drives may also be responsible for certain types of anxious and depressive responses....  continue reading

Can The Weather Make You Depressed? Seasonal Affective Disorder, Depression and Vitamin D

Thursday, January 30, 2014 by Meg   •   Filed under Physical Health and Emotion


Yeah, right. It's about two hundred degrees below zero, and snow is bullshit.

Something to consider, though: it is usually right around this time of year when depressive symptoms spike, particularly for those in colder climates. And researchers say that some of these mood changes might be related to low vitamin D levels....  continue reading

How Healthy Are Your Boundaries? Understanding Personal Boundary Styles to Build Better Relationships

Friday, January 24, 2014 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

When children are small, it's almost as if you're one person, the lines between you and them blurring as you spend your day tending to another's needs. A few years later, when you find them rummaging through your purse for the car keys, those boundaries are far more defined.

Boundaries are something we actively do and adjust. Because of this, it may be hard to decide when your boundaries are being breached.

Except with that car keys thing. 

"Get out of my shit, punk!"

Do you feel victimized? Guilty? Overwhelmed? It may be time to check out your personal boundaries and decide how well they are working for you....  continue reading

How Safe Is Your Television? Why The Nightly News Might Cause Anxiety

Monday, January 20, 2014 by Meg   •   Filed under Anxiety

Humans are predisposed to mimic each other. Merely surrounding yourself with happy people can increase your own happiness in kind1. From the avoidance of food poisoning through reflexive vomiting to crying with a friend, our facial expressions reliably reflect the state of those around us. But this tendency to mimic can also lead to unnecessary anxiety by altering our view of the world we live in. 

AKA: When the nightly news attacks! 

Or maybe not. I guess it's usually more like:  "Way to go, channel ten! I was happy ten minutes ago!"...  continue reading

What Is Codependency? Narcissism, Flexibility and The Definition of Modern Codependent Relationships

Friday, January 17, 2014 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

Our different versions of the term "codependency" can cause a great deal of confusion. One set of behaviors may be pathologically codependent in one couple, and be healthy and normal in another couple who function differently as a unit. This can be hard to understand when we see things primarily through the lens of our own experience, heightening our tendency to see codependency where it might not actually exist. 

But sometimes, it totally exists. And we should know what it looks like....  continue reading

What Causes Codependency? How To Create A Codependent Relationship

Monday, January 13, 2014 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

There was a time when individuals within groups had to be dependent on one another for survival. As reciprocal altruism evolved, we developed the drive both to give and to repay debts to even out overages and shortages within groups, thereby ensuring higher rates of survival for all members.This mutual assistance was not a disorder. Relying on others was just what you did to not fucking die. 

But, then and now, there was probably room to get carried away. Pathological altruism is a pattern of nurturing that, instead of helping the giver or the group, has unsuccessful outcomes1

AKA: the "My Bad, It Seemed Like a Good Idea At The Time" response....  continue reading