Why Hugh Hefner May Be On The "Wright" Track: Little Known Reasons That Polygamy May Benefit Women

Tuesday, October 10, 2017 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

Okay, so if you're all about the monogamous union for reasons other than personal choice, you may want to stop reading now. Because while hate mail is obviously fun, it's nowhere near as fun as polygamy. (Ba dum dum, ching.)

Let's be clear up front: I am not advocating for this arrangement, nor am I trying to promote it. There are even pieces of this particular issue that make me a little queasy. I see this more as a discussion of an interesting evolutionary argument--a mind bender, an article to explore a side of an issue I never before considered. Humans did not evolve to be specifically monogamous, but that's beside the point. Because according to Robert Wright, author of The Moral Animal, there may be a liberal feminist argument for polygamy1....  continue reading

"I Hate Him." How to Make Marriage Work

Tuesday, June 13, 2017 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

“We used to be so happy.”

“He’s not the same person I married.”

“I just don’t…know anymore.”

You’ve been together a little while, huh? At first it was perhaps just a physical issue, a lack of attraction, of sexual desire, especially after the kids. But now it’s more than that. You see that the things you once found endearing are super annoying. 

“OH DEAR GOD WHY DOES HE CHEW LIKE THAT?!” 

“Did I just step on a fucking toenail clipping?”

But it’s more than passing annoyance. You think that perhaps you have outgrown your partner, that maybe he stayed the same while you gleaned what you needed and matured. Why are you still there with all this stress? You don’t want to stay only for the kids, do you? And yet, you must have been into him at some point. Maybe you could be again. But do you even want to?...  continue reading

"I'm Not in the Mood." The Usual Decline of Sexual Interest (and what do do about it)

Tuesday, February 14, 2017 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

“I just want a quickie.”  

“I feel used.” 

“I think we should have sex more often.” 

“I think you need to show me more emotional support first.”

“How about just a blow job?” 

“How about a back rub?”

“Why do you always want sex?”

“Why don’t you want it more?”

“God, I’m just so…bored.”

Sound familiar? If you're like thousands of other couples this Valentine's Day, you might be having one of these conversations. We can't all be like Shannon and Morrison in my second novel, Conviction. (Rawr.)

Sexual issues come up often in relationship counseling, and they can be tricky to tease apart, unlike your husband’s legs. (Ba dum dum, ching). While sexual activity is at a peak in early relationships, it tends to decline over time. But why? We surely love our spouse more now than we do when we met them, don’t we?

Why would our sexual desire so reliably go down (and not in the fun way)? There are quite a few reasons, and obviously all of them cannot be discussed in one post. But while this isn’t a universal truth for everyone, there are a few, very common reasons for a loss of desire. And while I will be addressing the ladies here only because I more often see couples where women have lower drives, keep in mind that these roles can be reversed. 

Come with me. (heh) Let’s check this out....  continue reading

Things That Block Orgasm: What Women Need To Know About Serotonin Balance

Tuesday, January 17, 2017 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships


Serotonin does more than keep depression at bay. This neurotransmitter also allows the rest of the brain to communicate with regions responsible for self-control and planning functions. This may explain why serotonin imbalance has been linked to issues from obsessive compulsive traits to substance dependence 1

But a lack of serotonin does more than regulate impulses and alter mood. Serotonin also plays a big role in sexual function. Without enough serotonin, orgasm may not come as quickly, if it comes at all (pun totally intended)....  continue reading

The Minimalist Guide to Internal Working Models: How Early Experience Shapes Later Relationships

Tuesday, November 22, 2016 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

Early life experiences can shape our later relationships and our emotional profiles. 

Upset that you inherited their father's nose? You may have gotten his trust issues as well.

Internal Working Models of Relationships

Your internal working model refers to how you see the world and predict events. An individual's internal working model of relationships is formed in response to the type of care they receive early on. In essence, early attachment changes how you come to see your later relationships and the amount of trust you have for partners. It can also be passed down through generations because it changes how people respond to their own children....  continue reading

Platonic Friendships, Friends With Benefits and Relationship Complications

Tuesday, November 08, 2016 by Meg   •   Filed under Sexuality/Relationships

In relationship therapy sessions, there is often another individual in the background, underlying arguments and punctuating negative feelings: the platonic opposite sex friend. Often men and women have difficulty seeing eye to eye on this issue. 

But it isn’t their fault. It’s all part of an evolved mechanism that may lead men and women to see these relationships in very different contexts, either subconsciously or right out in the open. But without understanding those elements, it is difficult to work through them....  continue reading